Smart Mouth

Well, that was a little dramatic. But, I couldn’t think of a different title.

So, anyhoodle. Before you all go into withdrawl and whatnot. Here is the recap of my day.

A day full of sucktitude, but some good stuff thrown in too. As usual, I will focus on the negative. What? WHAT? You like it when I am negative. Don’t lie.

1. Grandma is in the hospital with pneumonia. AND. Like that doesn’t suck enough. Today is her 96th birthday. I had pneumonia once. It sucked. I can’t imagine what it is like to have when you are 96. On your birthday. Pray for her. AND internets! You know I am deadly serious when I am asking you to pray. I don’t ever ask anyone to pray. Ever.

2. After a continuing education radio commercial this morning, my son turned to me and asked if when he went to college (6 years from now) would there be a lot of old people there? (picture him saying this with a look on his face that suggests he just smelled something rotten) I said, why? Because I don’t really want to go to school with a bunch of old people. (Again with the pinch face) Me – Well, what is old? Him – (wait for it……………………….) 35. Yeah. Hey, remember when I blogged about taking some more college classes next year? I. take. that. back.

3. Later daughter yells at me in car, follow that car!!! Me – What?!? Why?!? She says, because in it is the boy that I love! And I want to smile at him! So, I did what only a loving mother would do. Hit the brakes. No. Just kidding. I followed it. She smiled at him. Then we went home and I gave her the lecture of her life. It went something like this….. NO LOVE FOR YOU! TOO LITTLE!

4. I start making dinner. And realize that instead of buying “Lemon Pepper” I bought “Seven Pepper”. Doh!

5. Then I get a threatening letter in the mail from the home owner’s association. Seems I didn’t pay my dues for last year. So, they are threatening to put a lein on my house unless I pay up. Apparently $100 is very important to them. It is important to note that the dues were due way before I moved in. And no one told us about them. So. I yell for a while, threaten to write a threatening letter back. BB tells me that while I may be good at threatening letters, I am not so good at respectful threatening letters. Nice. So, he writes the letter. Fine. Gives me more time to figure out how to turn seven pepper into lemon pepper.

6. Then my sister calls to question my judgement concerning the ex-boyfriend blog. Have I mentioned she is my #1 blog fan? So, yeah. Makes me question my judgement too. Read it now while you can. I may delete it later.

7. Then. While I am sitting here typing this, BB comes up and says, wait! Sit still! and he places both hands on my head. I am about to scream, because I think it is a tick.  But. It isn’t a tick. It. is. a. grey. hair. Holy cracked wheat cracker! A grey hair. So. I cried. A lot. AND, I may cry again later too. I don’t want to be old, people!

So, that was the bad part of the day. There were good parts too. The middle part of the day was nice. I talked on the phone and whatnot. Smiled until my cheeks hurt. But, it isn’t as much fun to be all positive, am I right? Don’t answer that.