Alive!

May 13, ’08 9:30 PM
for Mel ‘s friends, Mel ‘s family and Mel ‘s online buddies

And more importantly, so are all the children! Because today was the day that I chaperoned the field trip. Why do I always sign up for these things? I asked Rikki that today and she said because “Margarita and Permission Slip = Dangerous Combination!”

So, we left on the 30 minute bus ride at 9am. Aren’t we adorable?

It was so nice today, unusually cool for SC. The high today was only 76 and there was a nice breeze. So yay! One reason not to be an angry chaperone!

The first thing we did was ride the farm trolley with Farmer Tom. Yikes. Farmer Tom had an ego… it was ALL about him. What about the happy cows Farmer Tom? First grade kids do not want to know about how you worked at a super market and were unhappy until you threw reason to the wind and bought a farm, but then milk prices went down and the laws were changed and you were unhappy again, blah, blah, bitter, blah, blah….

So, we ignored him and took pictures.

Also? Farmer Tom liked to say Zip-ed-Dee-do-da-day and Hunky Dory. GAH! Bitter and dorky is NOT a good combo. He wanted the kids to participate during Angry Farmer Storytime by saying Hunky Dory! So he would say, so then milk prices went up and everything waaaaaaaaaas ________ and the kids were supposed to say HUNKY DORY! I was laughing so hard because either there would be silence, or a couple kids saying Errrrrrr…. or one kid kept shouting Hunky DO DA!

We interrupt this blog for the required picture of cows.

Since the kids were not into participating, I picked up the slack for them. When Farmer Tom said, What kind of milk do we put on our cereal? I shouted SOY MILK! When he asked how chocolate milk was made, I shouted Chocolate COWS! And when he asked if anyone had questions I asked, “so, it is a myth that the only happy cows reside in California?” and later, I asked “how many cows do you have to milk to get a gallon of soy milk?” It is all good. Farmer Tom and I had an understanding… or I worked Zip-ed-dee-doo-da and hunky dory into my conversation as much as possible and he understood that to mean I was his buddy.

Next we ate lunch, and I chased a disturbed little man-child around a tractor and then plucked him from his perch on the frame of the trolley. Good times!

Then it was time for Strawberry picking, also know as mels.ocd.goes.into.overdrive. I didn’t want to stop until I picked every Strawberry on that farm. WHAT? Someone needs to! And at the moment it felt like it was ME! But, alas… we were only allowed to fill one teeny plastic container. Another round in the game I like to call TortureTheChaperone.

Then it was over. What? So soon? At least that is what I said while smiling and pushing children onto the bus. Hey, at least I was pushing them ONTO the bus and not UNDER the bus.

We blew Farmer Tom some air kisses and thanked him for his hunky dory tour and a zip-ed-dee-doo-da day at The Happy Cow Creamery!

Then we occupied ourselves on the way home by eating sour gummi worms and MORE self portraits! Of course!