Love is wearing a stinky face mask for 20 mins because your daughter wants to get a facial with you and actually taking pictures of said activity and sharing it on the interweb. Now you know that my secret for staying so darn cute is wearing a clay face mask that makes me look like … More What is love?
Hope everyone had a happy 4th! We had a low key holiday, just hanging out with friends and neighbors in the culdesac. The morning started with a Bloody Mary bar, which I didn’t participate in because I was busy slaving over these: 60 Mini Key Lime Tarts. At 3:30 all the kids gathered with their … More Happy 4th of July
…. and I am addicted to a de-shedding brush. Backstory: We had a de-shedding brush a few years ago, but I got banned from using it after an episode wherein I drank a lot and then decided to de-shed our Siamese cat. Problem was, I only combed directly down the center of her back. I … More Hi, my name is Mel…
This week’s show is called: Naked and Afraid BA-BA-BAAAAAAAMMMMM! (That was a dramatic sound effect) Contestants are dropped off in the middle of nowhere, naked obviously, and they have to survive for 21 days. They are given a rudimentary map, showing them a few water sources and the pick up point where they are to … More What I am watching
1. I am an awesome boat driver. Even better than a car driver. I’m totally addicted to it. I want to go boating EVERY.single.DAY. 2. I love leeks. And squash. And brussel sprouts. And all sorts of random food I had no idea I liked. 3. I think this means my taste buds are OLD … More Ten Thought Monday
So, here’s the thing…. I dream a lot. I don’t dream about puppies and rainbows and unicorns. I dream about awful things and I do not know why. At least 2-3 nights a week I wake up scared to death, either having been murdered or watched some sort of violent act. I admitted this to … More I had a dream…
1. Even the dog knows better than to go outside when it’s below 0 and tries to avoid the harsh weather by peeing in the garage or a second less desirable location, the front porch. 2. Yellow snow. 3. Take out is more like leftovers because by the time you drive it home you have … More Winter sucks
This past Saturday my friend Cate invited me to go to Zumba with her. I wasn’t sure if I would physically be able to do Zumba, but Cate seemed so enthusiastic I thought I’d give it a try. Also, I was drinking when she asked me. By this morning, I was wondering what the hell … More In which I am white as rice.
So, what do you do when you lose your leverage? Because I am completely baffled. All of Cody’s life we have heard teacher after teacher tell us how smart he was. But, it was always like this: “Cody is very smart, however he doesn’t apply himself.” or “Cody is very smart and does very well in … More Leverage
So, Carsten is a tween now. Tweens are more challenging than I remember. Or maybe tween girls are more challenging than tween boys? Or maybe I am just OLD. Recently Carsten decided to give a little neighbor girl a makeover. She considers herself an expert on all things beauty now…. evidenced by her make up,hair … More Tween’ing
Smart Mouth 